Meeting Your Darkness
The idea of soul retrievals and shadow healings rose in popularity since the sort-of new age renaissance of 2020. (But this ‘renaissance’ and its impact on cultural spiritual tradition is a conversation for another time and place.) Soul retrievals are often associated with curanderismo of Mesoamerican and South American cultures and in all honesty, historically, culturally and spiritually, these are all concepts that I know very little about.
What I am familiar with is darkness, both philosophically and spiritually (more in the Buddhist Mahayana tradition.) The darkness we carry within ourselves, and our fear of confronting an unseen and unsettling force. Darkness is easily equated with malice and evil but it shouldn’t be confused as the same thing. The energy of darkness holds a different energy and likeness.
If there’s one thing I am aware of myself is the natural darkness that I was born with.
This topic was spurred by a conversation I had with a client (and beautiful soul!) regarding my dislike of entering a metaphysical shop that is marketed in the ‘love and light’ fashion, and how it took the staff years to warm up with me. My experience in that shop went as far as an attendant trying to purify and cleanse my heart because they thought I needed it. But upon recalling that memory and discussing it with her now, hearing her perspective was interesting.
She mentioned that when we first met, she said I looked different than the rest. She lovingly compared my energy to that of the Addams Family and Maleficent. Both highly misunderstood, outcasted, dark characters but known for their love for each other and others. (Maleficent especially in the recent Disney movies.) But it’s that energy that is so misunderstood.
She also told me that if there is one part of the world where people would not fear me, it would be in central and south america due to the respect that is placed on curanderos. Curanderos/Curanderas are traditional healers based on indigenous practices that are able to walk both the path of darkness and light without attaching themselves to any judgment. It’s the darkness they hold that makes them intimidating at first because you know they have a lot of unbiased truth to share.
Darkness is the void. It is the source of creation. The beginning and the end.
Darkness is the underworld. It is a place of the ancestral realm.
Darkness balances lightness. It brings harmony. Without darkness, you cannot properly have lightness or understand it.
Darkness brings perspective. It brings an understanding behind lightness.
Darkness brings beauty through the ugly, the outcast, the edge.
Those that work with shadows and the underworld are glorious at recognizing truths, even the truths within themselves. It is understanding the pain that others not only caused to you, but you have inflicted upon others and yourself.
The truth behind this is everyone, absolutely everyone, has this within themselves but most people choose to run away from it. They are actively running away from the very energy that has the source of their potential and their power.
Think of Friedrich Nietzche’s ubermensch from “Also sprach Zarathustra”, where he discusses how the version of ourselves we wish to be is often not expressed because we are conditioned to live abiding by some sort of moralistic values. And to be honest, Nietzche condensed in one sentence, along with this post of mine. Maybe I can expand the ubermensch in another post.
It is people’s inability to confront their own shadow that makes them believe that others are monsters (however they define that to be), or that others are always the problem. It's a way to not take accountability for the consequences of their choices. And it’s so easy to confuse the shadow with personal self-empowerment. Yes, both are linked to one another, but true personal self-empowerment comes in the form of severe and blatant accountability because let’s not mistake our darkness with delusion. You can’t be defensive with this part of yourself.
Truly embodying your shadow is not dressing punk or goth, or appearing edgy. It’s this radical form of accepting this side of yourself that will show through any layer of clothing, or piercing, or tattoo, or whatever.
When I first started my journey, not a lot of people wanted to work with me because of this part of myself within my aura. I was shunned a lot, and even a mentor that represented love and light, ultimately criticized this part of myself. At first she was an amazing mentor but ultimately I became disappointed in her because she attempted to stray me away from my path by telling me that I was not meant to do soul retrievals, further taking me away from self-acceptance. I knew she was dishonest and decided to part ways with her and always felt that she saw me as an enemy when I was only there as a student and friend. I saw her shift her blame onto me. I saw her shadow but wonder if she properly sees it herself. We all hold a purpose and must acknowledge it within each other with respect and humility.
I plan to make new pick-a-cards on discovering your shadow and embodying it. I also offer soul retrievals and channeled shadow readings.